Yesterday I returned to Durham, also known as the happiest place on Earth. This journey could be equated to an influencer’s voyage to Dubai, given the fact they ought to consider it their happiest place on Earth if finding it necessary to go in a global pandemic. Except, when you do compare the two they are still radically dissimilar events. Alas, here are some thoughts from the past week:
My summative essay has been submitted! Which means a lot of what counts towards the end of the year has now been completed for this term and I can *breathe* whilst also completing x, y and z other assignments I have continued to ignore.
I’m doing seminar prep work on the first French dictionaries of 1694 and an excerpt from Furetière’s Dictionnaire Universel on the definition of the adjective Ami(e). One of the examples was ’il n’y a rien plus rare que de vrais amis’ (meaning there is nothing rarer than true friends), which is true and something this insight into the french language taught me this week.
That moment you realise you just really love the subject you’re studying and the beauty of language and ugh despite my loathing of the passive construction in French, I was doing some practice on it this week and had one of those moments.
Song of the week: Weekend Friend by Goth Babe.
Things I would like to take back with me to university: a lifetime supply of grapes, a greater level of confidence, the ability to convince my roommate Taylor Swift is worth listening to.
Some things I am looking forward to when I get back to university: running in Durham, walking in Durham, my roommate, dancing in a room with more than one person.
It wouldn’t be lockdown without baking a banana bread; the first of lockdown #3. One of my flatmates is vegan so I made this recipe: https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/vegan-banana-bread – adding dark chocolate instead of nuts and fruit, as well as a little bit of vanilla essence.
For the first time since 9th December, I’ve finally journaled. It was not an outpouring of emotion or stream of consciousness but a recounting of some happy memories from these 7 weeks at home, as well as goals for the next month. January this year has not dragged but has felt quite non-eventful. I suppose the Tik-Toks are a visual journal to remind myself that I have achieved things or at least done more than just sit at a desk and develop zoom fatigue. The tangibility of words on paper immortalise moments that we might have otherwise forgotten so perhaps I didn’t write constantly because I didn’t think there were enough moments worth remembering, or that I will remember them without journaling.
I’m on the train up to Durham, trying not to sob at It’s a Sin and writing a letter for my friend’s birthday on Monday. The rain departs to sun and sun shifts to clouds; England’s rolling hills are about the most patriotic I will get about our country.
On questioning my consumption:
‘Not looking at dresses I cannot afford on Vestiare collective’. Was something I was about to tweet before it slipped into my drafts as something I probably shouldn’t. I then questioned ‘what kind of influencer am I to be subtly encouraging consumption?’ Not an influencer at all, one may suggest, but then we are all influencers to a certain extent. If we had one follower, we could still influence that one person. But that is digressing. That tweet is okay. It is a realistic product of my activity at the time, and whilst I shan’t be buying new clothing, for the time being, I realise that if one is going to encourage consumption at least it is on a sustainable level.
Also, and I have spoken about this in a delightful infographic on my Instagram, the psychology of when and what we buy runs deep. I am now inundated with ASOS hauls on my Tik Tok FYP, often weekly by the same person and whilst it is infuriating, what once was the serotonin caused by looking forward to plans has been replaced by the arrival of delivery; or multiple. It is a systemic issue that needs to be addressed by Fast Fashion brands but is also unfortunately perpetuated by social media. This conversation about consumption, clothing and ethics ought to be a continuous conversation – not one reserved for a few lines on Instagram or a paragraph in a blog post.
Lots of love, eleanor xx
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